Monday, March 16, 2020

Memoirs of 2019

This has been a challenge, quite literally so! Getting back to blogging, after presumably a decade, has been quite a task, and it was actually a pact between a dear neighbour and me. We both required motivation to start writing and we challenged each other to it. A wonderful challenge, but quite challenging nonetheless!!

We chose an easy topic, to begin with. We decided to simply reflect back upon the year gone by. After all, a reflection is a good way to retrospect and then look ahead. So here goes my Memoir for 2019 - the year that was strange, fulfilling, disappointing and adventurous, all at once!

2019 began with a reluctant acceptance of the fact that we were in a new city. The move had happened a few months back, but perhaps I was in denial. Leaving a city where I had settled in well was a pretty disheartening thing to do. The main reason for that was quitting the job I had just joined, after being away from a career for half a decade. It was gut-wrenching, but I had to do it, and so accepting the move and the new city was especially hard. It reminded me of missed opportunities, unfulfilled aspirations and other such negative associations that served me no good. I knew I had to leave that behind me and look ahead, so 2019 began with acceptance and I finally warmed up to the place that I had started calling home.

I enjoyed living in Pune. What I loved most was the house. We had a palace to ourselves! I liked calling it my own football stadium, simple because of its magnitude. The house was very large, and for someone who’s pretty much used to living in smaller houses, this was a treat. I also enjoyed my solitude. I was working from home, so I could just stay by myself the whole day. Those who know me, know just how much I enjoy staying alone. While I may come across as someone who loves socialising and is a total extrovert, I actually am quite the introvert inside. My biggest fear is not dying alone - it is being surrounded by people all the time! 2019 gave me ample time and opportunity to enjoy my “me-time” and that is one of the greatest takeaways.

After a couple of super hectic years, I also got a lot of time to connect with my child. Since I was at home most of the time, I managed my work and spent some wonderful moments with him. From going swimming together to reading bedtime storybooks to experimenting in the kitchen together, 2019 gave me some wonderful memories with my little one.

The year had its share of challenges as well. Our family went through a severe crisis, and it was at this time that I understood the value of familial bonds. I have always been deeply grateful to my parents for helping us realise the importance of having family and loving everyone irrespective of what happens. 2019 threw many challenges at us that we could only overcome because of the deep bond we share. We pulled together as a family and saw it through.

2019 kept surprising me at every turn. Just when I had settled into my new home and things seemed pretty sorted, I was told that we were to return. It was such a mixed feeling! While I knew I could get back to my job and resume from where I left, I secretly wept about the luxuries I was to give up! I didn't want to give up that huge house. I did not want to give up my flexible workdays. I did not want to give up the relaxed, laid-back life and return to the crazy rat race. But deep within I knew very well - the latter was what I was cut out for, I could not sustain the sedentary lifestyle for too long. 

2019 ended with new beginnings. I had come back to where I belonged. I braced for new challenges and I resumed from where I left. It was a topsy-turvy year for sure, with tremendous ups and heartbreaking lows (did I mention India’s World Cup journey?). But I pulled through and here I am now, excited and looking forward to new challenges.

And yes, I do intend to write more. :)

Friday, August 26, 2011

The sky is silver


The sky is silver!

Not gloomy grey, not blinding bright

Just the perfect balance the senses need

They say every cloud has a silver lining

But here I find silver strewn all over!

Oh what a wonderful sight to behold

And every sparkle in the sky speaks to me

“Smile, the dark days of despair are over”

Thursday, December 16, 2010

boredom

i have discovered that boredom is my downfall. the moment i have nothing to do, i start feeling depressed. all kinds of negative thoughts come to my mind n i start feeling very very demotivated.

i need to occupy myself. i need to get out of the house. i just wish there were more things to do n see. i just cant b staying idle like this n hating myself for having horrible thoughts.

Tuesday, December 7, 2010

December already?

its december. really? where did the year go?

Sunday, October 24, 2010

Getting old(er)

Birthdays used to be a lot of fun. Not anymore. Well, of course it's fun to be the birthday girl and get the hugs, gifts, handshakes, gifts, wishes, gifts, phone calls, did i mention gifts?! :P but then, when you realise that you are a whole year older..yeah like a WHOLE GOD-DAMN YEAR OLDER, it takes a lot away from it. sigh....

The best part about birthdays is definitely the (no not the gifts...i'm not that shallow also!) cake. caaaaaaake! aah! i love cake! and i love my birthdays because owing to the sheer number of friends i have, i end up having more that one party and therefore more than one cake. JOY!

friends...yes that reminds me of a very funny fact. every year i have additions to my friends list. this year too i have made some great new friends who would most definitely be invited. sadly though, the one i really, really want to have around wont be there :(

so all in all i guess birthdays are just about OK. they have surely lost their charm...i used to be kicked from october 1 and would actually cross off days from the calender when i was younger. but now i wish i could do something in great contrast to that!!!! so while on one hand there are the gifts, the cake, the hugs, the wishes and the happy-happy spoilt feeling, on the other there is the realisation that i am growing OLD. bloody hell i'll be in my late twenties now!!! how scary is that?!!! i wanted to be so many things before i was 27 and i got nothing done :((( but i guess its ok...i'll survive and if all goes well, i'll be writing a similar post next year and cribbing perhaps a little more :D

till then, a very happy birthday to me!!!!